Package i
The Frank Package
Basic frank service for frankly modest events. Frank delegates this one. You will not, in fact, meet Frank.
From $48 · pp
Up to 30 guests
A frank
frank house,
frankly.
A short biography of the only man, vegetable, or processed meat product to have ever frankly farmed franks at this scale, in this borough, with this level of frankness.
Since 1986, Frank has been frankly farming franks in the most frank manner possible. Frank, who is both a farmer named Frank AND a frank (if you know what we mean, wink wink), has dedicated his frankly frank life to the frankest pursuit of frank excellence.
Our Frank grows his franks on the frankest farm in Frankville, where every frank is frankly the frankest frank you'll ever frank. Frank's franks are so frank, they make other franks feel frankly inadequate about their frankness.
Frank frankly believes that frankness is next to godliness, which is why his franks are blessed by the Frank Gods of Frankdom. Each frank is hand-selected by Frank himself, who can frankly tell a frank frank from a fake frank from a mile away.
39
Years frankly farming franks
1,142
Franks hand-selected per week
∞
Frankness, theoretical maximum
Six dishes, prepared by Frank, frankly. Composed of franks Frank himself selected, in fields Frank himself frankly tilled. Substitutions politely declined; Frank has thoughts.
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01
The Frank Frank
Signature · House preparationFrank's signature frank, frankly prepared by Frank himself. It's so frank, it practically introduces itself as Frank.
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02
Frank's Frank Pancakes
All day · Brunch favouritePancakes shaped like franks, because Frank frankly loves franks so much he puts them in everything. Frankly delicious.
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03
The Double Frank Frank
For two · Sharing strongly discouraged by FrankTwo franks for double the frankness. Frank says it's twice as frank as the Frank Frank, which is frankly impossible, but Frank insists.
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04
Frank's Frank Salad
Garden · Frankly greenA salad with chopped franks, frank dressing, and frank croutons. Frank's attempt at being healthy, frankly.
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05
Frank's Frank Smoothie
Off-menu · At your own riskWe don't recommend this one. Frank insists it's "frankly refreshing" but frankly, we're concerned about Frank's judgment.
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06
The Frank Experience
Tasting · Seven courses · Three hoursA seven-course frank tasting menu prepared by Frank while he tells you frankly too much about his life as a frank farmer named Frank.
Two purpose-built frank houses in lower Manhattan. Both opening soon — sign up below to be told, frankly, the moment Frank is ready.
A private room, a long table, a fire, and Frank — narrating each course, frankly, until your party gently requests he stop.
At Farmer of a Frank, we focus on the frankly welcoming atmosphere of Frank's frank establishments, with wooden frank holders, warm frank-colored fabrics, and cozy frank-shaped fireplaces. Our frankly inviting spaces offer a break from the non-frank world, perfect for frank celebrations, frank meetings, or special frank occasions with frankly fantastic friends and family.
Our attentive staff (all named Frank, naturally) is committed to making your frank visit frankly memorable and helping you create lasting frank memories in a frankly beautiful frank setting. Frank personally oversees every frank event to ensure maximum frankness.
- i Frank's Frank Birthday Parties · Frank provides the franks
- ii Corporate Frank Meetings · Frank-to-frank discussions encouraged
- iii Frank Wedding Receptions · Frank cries frankly at every ceremony
- iv Frank Bar Mitzvahs · Today you are a Frank!
- v Frank Thanksgiving · Frank provides frankly everything
No. 06 — Frank Catering
Frank, brought to you.
Frank will frankly cater your event with the frankest franks this side of Franktown. Whether you need frank appetizers, frank entrees, or frank desserts (yes, Frank makes frank ice cream), Frank's got you frankly covered.
Package ii
The Frankly Frank Package
Enhanced frank experience with extra frankness. Frank arrives, says hello, frankly leaves before dessert.
From $84 · pp
30–80 guests
Package iii
The Frankest Frank Package
Premium frank service where Frank himself attends and frankly won't stop talking about franks.
From $140 · pp
80+ guests